Beer Education

These humans I live with. I just don’t get it.

First they decide to have a baby. 

Didn’t even ask me what I thought about it. Just did it.

And now this kid is seriously cramping my beer drinking style. They BARELY go out more than once or twice a week or so AND THEY KEEP FORGETTING ME AT HOME!

But they take the kid!

Assholes.

Anyway.

First the kid. Now, they’re really working more on the home brewing stuff. 

Not complaining about that, I just wish the tap handles on the keezer were a little more Jackalope-friendly. 

But along with the homebrew stuff, they’ve decided to do this beer education thing by doing talks about beer and homebrewing at the Rogers Experimental House. Which is cool and all… but they’re limiting me on how much of the beer I can sample before the events.

I complained that I have always been helpful in sampling for quality control. I provide a service.

The humans response? Well, let’s just say some hurtful words were used.

Words rhyming with “hush” and…”grunk”… and “schmoozehound”.

 

So, I’ve decided to express my feelings with an original poem.

Beer, beer, it’s all here,

but nary a pint for the rabbit-deer.

Beer, beer, everywhere,

but not for me and THAT’S UNFAIR.

Beer, beer, overflowing the lids,

THIS IS DISCRIMINATION AGAINST ANTLERED CRYPTIDS!